Wednesday, August 30, 2006

I'm Out

Me and the MrsJAC are two-up on the SwampThing gone for Gumbo at the Magnolia Cafe' in Natchez Under the Hill. I'll hoist one fer y'all.

Nate was gonna go, but his wife said, "No." Bummer. Maybe next time, Bro.

We're Sorry, BrandX. You Can Come Back Now!

Actually, even though I've been givin' the Harley fella's hell, Ol' BrandX is still checkin' in and even contributing every now and then. Good on ya', Brother.

He did try to get us Jap bike riders to use anti-sieze compound when replacing screws on our bikes, though, so he might actually be pissed. I can just see myself Thumpin' blissfully down the road when I hit 6500RPM; ol' SwampThing goes into Auto DisAssembley Mode and all the Self Removing Bolts start turnin' out at speed.

And just so y'all know I ain't takin' myself too seriously while whackin' the Harley boys, this fella was spoted in pennsylvania on his KLR:

I don't have the optional milkcrate, but if I did mine would be black.

Tuesday, August 29, 2006

Harley Bashing Never Gets Old

From my inbox this morning:

Since this also seems to be the funny-Harley-story thread I'll chime in.

I was sitting in the shade on my parked R100 eating my lunch between classes yesterday when a 40-something Harley rider rides up on his shiney '06 model and parks right next to me... in my parking space. I didn't say anything and I didn't really even mind because if he felt enough kinship with me to park in the same space just because I also ride a motorcycle then he must be alright.

It turns out he was alright and we talked while I finished my lunch. He told me about his bike and how much he enjoyed it and asked questions about mine.

The funny part happened at the end of the conversation when he said "You're not going to believe this, but I've put 1200 miles on this thing since I got it in June."

I just smiled and said "Wow, you must have had a great summer."

He asked how many miles I have on my bike and I told him 256,000. The look on his face was great and then I said "Yeah, you're not going to believe this, but I put about 1200 miles on this thing every two weeks."

(Disclaimer: Yes it's a 25 year old bike and no I didn't put all those miles on it, but I do put about 1200 miles on it every 2 weeks just because of commuting. That doesn't include weekend riding or trips.)


I had a similar experience with my parent's neighbor. The fella is restoring and old Sportster 1000 and doin' one hell of a job. The Brothers 'C' are always pickin' with him about it, especially since he knows better having had a Z1 "back in the day.

Well one day he had enough ribbing and whined, all but throwing a crying fit. All because I playfully scoffed at how little he and other Harley owners actually rode their bikes. My first reaction was to try and smooth things over, but I quickly figured out it was just that he was havin' trouble reconciling his Harley fantasy with our assertions of reality, how ever much they were in jest.

It must have really stuck in his craw 'cause later he came over to poke fun of SwampThing loaded on the trailer for the trip home.

"You ride that much?"
-yep.
"I bet those knobbies are rough on the highway"
-Not too bad.
"They wear out fast, too, don't they."
-Not as fast as you'd think. They're a pretty good on/off road compromise
"How many miles that thing got on it?"
- 30,000.
Keep in mind SwampThing looks for all the world like a dirtbike and it's only a 2003.

He kept his composure, but those eyes were on the ground.

Monday, August 28, 2006

Dude Bought a Harley

Ever wonder what those dentists are thinkin' out there on their chrome pigs?

A little insight:
It ran great! In the course of about an hour I put about 15 miles on it in stop-and-go traffic without encountering any problems at all. Aside from a few embarrassing moments when I killed it trying to take off while facing up a hill (with cars racked up behind me, all probably laughing uproariously at the geek on the Harley), it was righteous. It was stupendous. I motored around Greenlake in the sun with my feet on the pegs, the wind in my face, and tears of joy streaming down my cheeks. I was a badass. Bad to the bone! Ride to live, live to ride you sumbitches! The sociopathic tendencies that exist in all bikers blossomed and coursed through my veins. A foot-long grey beard magically sprouted out of my face as faded tattoos spread across my arms and back. Blasting through a busy crosswalk doing 40 over the limit, I stuck my leg out and laughed as my titanium shinguard smashed a little ol' lady's walker into smithereens. I tore off my helmet and hurled it at The Man sitting in his cage in a Winchell's parking lot. I pumped 12-gauge rounds into a whole row of Quiet Please / Hospital Zone signs and then held the throttle wide open with my shin through the center of the shopping mall while I leaned back and reloaded. Raised $50,000 for a local children's home through a biker club rally too. It was a most enjoyable day.


After having it for awhile, he comes to this conclusion:

Over the next 18 months, I put over 3000 miles on the scooter and over 1000 miles on the Sportster. I can safely say that there are significant differences between the two. In many ways, the little scooter is the superior machine.

Within about 3 weeks of daily commuting on the scooter, I began to feel more confident in my ability to come to a rapid stop without having to think too much about it. The scooter felt more and more like riding a motorized bicycle. The Harley felt like riding an aircraft carrier in comparison. It never felt as nimble as the scooter, probably because, well, it isn't. This was true at speed as well as when parking. The scooter can be bumped over curbs and wedged between dumpsters without a second thought. There's no danger of it tipping over while you're weaving around at low speed because it doesn't weigh anything. If it does fall over, it's no big deal.

I ride the scooter rain or shine, mud, gravel, whatever. Part of the Harley's appeal, and value, is it's gloss black paint job, stainless steel braided cabling and hoses, and chrome. I don't want to blast through mudpuddles with it.

Sunday, August 27, 2006

After All the Shit

Reuters still has their staged "Suffering Lebanonese Broad" pic up on their website: