Gone Ridin'! Back ???

Gregg,
Helmets are to be replaced every 3 years, ya' jew.

R - Rated Y'all

Don't Play with those! You could put an eye out!
Courtesy of the New Guy.

Anybody have any experience/knowledge with these bikes?

FJR1300
ST1300
Buell XB12X

'Hear there's supposed to be a new Concours coming out, too.

Dish if ya' got it.

Where's My Check?

I can't leave yet! Damned hurricanetornado thing come to close afore my check. Done spent my goubment check on stuff lass week. Gotsta have new nike's, man, mine's dirty. Sumbody neeeds to pay for these new shoes this muddy water done messed up!

How Far We've Fallen

MrsJACIII and I rode the Mothership part way down the Natchez Trace from Nashville, Tn. yesterday and it put the deadbeats in New Orleans into sharp contrast with the MEN who formerly occupied this land in great numbers.
The Trace is 440 miles of road that generally follows the route farmers WALKED from Natchez Mississippi to get back home after floating downstream hundreds of miles to deliver the fruits of their labors to a market consolidation point.
These men would undertake a month long journey on foot, braving wild injuns, bears, snakes, storms, and highwaymen to get home. The slugs in New Orleans wouldn't walk out past the bypass to get food, water, or a place to shit.

And I thought I was hard on the Hardley guys...

Concisely put for those who don't get it:

My Ninja was powered by a 599cc (36 cubic inch) in-line four cylinder engine that was liquid cooled and had a high capacity oil cooler. It was the most compact, most powerful, most advanced 600cc engine currently in production on the planet at that time and received many accolades for its design from the major motorcycle publications. The compact engine produced ninety seven horsepower, a twin intake ram air setup with pressurized air box bumped that to probably another five percent additional power when under speed. Ninety-seven horsepower was a far cry from the outdated, air cooled irrigation pumps that powered the bikes that Milwaukee was producing. Eighty-eight cubic inches thumping out a laughable fifty something horsepower was about the most power you could get if you went with the best that America could build.

Now, to put into perspective, on a power output to engine size ratio, the Kawasaki's motor made ninety-seven horses out of a miniscule thirty-six cubic inches. That would be the equivalent of having a 350 cubic inch small block Chevy under your hood that made 944 horsepower from the factory, stock.

Black Echo


BrandX be forewarned, it gets pretty ugly.

disclaimer:
I HAVE met fellas who own Hardley's and actually ride. No, I don't mean up and down mainstreet, around and around the Walmart parking lot, or back and forth in front of the local high school, but a few hundred miles at a time actually going somewhere. There ain't many, but they are out there. You can spot 'em sometimes, they're usually old (like me), their bikes are dirty ('cause they ride 'em), and all the little and big things that must be done to get a Hardly down the road reliably have been done (they idle real slow - not just loud - without dieing at stoplights.)

Cowboy Up!

Me and a buddy, Jamie, shod 27 horses and one miniature donkey today, only 3 had to be tranquilized, 3 required swift kicks to the ribs, 4 needed stud chains, 2 got their ears damn near twisted off, and one required IV tranquilization, its ear twisted damn near off (lifted me off the ground w/ said ear), rib kicked, and the wooden handle of a 17 inch steel rasp bent upon its head. Craziest damn horse I've ever seen.

At one stop we worked on a man's horses for 2 1/2 hours, wrote him a bill for $500.00 and he called to thank us for the work we did.

I trimmed two horses on a horse farm big as most counties, with stables the size of mini malls and had a chick from Uraguay holdin' horse for me while a mexican handed me tools like I was in the OR (You end up really workin' your ass off when people hand you tools! I didn't know that.)

After all that I came home and rode BoJack the formerly unridable mustang who has to date thrown his previous owner and six men who break horses for a living. Whoo Hoo!

Jamie went on to fix one more dead lame horse w/o me before he called it a night. That's not dead and lame, but dead lame like deadlame or really very lame. You get it.

As you can probaly tell I'm thinkin' I'm a badass right about now.

'Nite Y'all!

Laughed My Ass Off

Vox on Hillary:

They will, once she finishes slithering through the water flooding the streets, devouring the dead as they float past her.

ALL HAIL THE LIZARD QUEEN!
VD | 08.31.05 - 12:41 pm

Global Eminent Domain

Expect to see similar soon:

The world's environment has long been put at risk by the excessive energy consumption of the United States and the recent tsunami and hurricane Katrina are but two examples of the coming onslaught the United State's irresponsible behavior has brought to the future of our children. Further, global shortages in energy due to the increasing incidence of catastrophic natural phenomena have put the world economy at risk and endangered the safety and well-being of billions its citizens the world over.

The United States has proven incapable of governing itself to the extent it is unable to reduce toxic waste, pollution, greenhouse emissions, and overdevelopment thereby placing the very existence of this planet in jeopardy. As such, we, The United Nations, must take steps to reign in the unsustainable rates of consumption and emissions of the United States. If the United States will not voluntarily, in concert with responsible nations the world over, control its disproportionate consumption and irresponsible energy practices it must be forced to control them. For the children. For our future.

Glory! Glory! Hallelujah!
Glory! Glory! Hallelujah!
Glory! Glory!....

oops! Wrong mega maniacal nation-state war of conquest.

You Heard it Here First

What are they doing to stem the flood in N'awlins? Same thing Bobby Lee did to preserve the St. Louis waterfront as an Army Corps Engineer before the War Agianst Northern Aggression.

Gregg,
Bobby Lee, in his early army career at the COE, diverted the Mississippi away from a part of the ST. Louis wterfront by strategicly sinking rock laden barges. I'm thinkin' barges preloaded and sunk along the wall would be a good way to slow the thing down.
JACIII 08.30.05 - 6:14 pm

Hope it works!

Finally Found Someone to Take Up for the Hardley Riders, er... Owners.

Q :What does a jap bike and a disposable diaper have in common?
A: they"re made of plastic, loaded wih shit, and hazardous waste once they are disposed of.
Brand X

This is a good example because it has no basis in truth whatsoever.

1) Jap bikes (and German and Brit and Italian and probably even Korean and Chinese) are miles ahead of Hardley in quality except for what matters to Hardley owners - chrome plated shiny bits. There are no Hardleys out there with 100,000 miles without having at least having the heads pulled.

2) Sportbikes do carry much plastic body work (as Buells) to keep your ass on the bike at triple digit speeds, but Jap bikes built for a comparable purpose to a Hardley carry none. I recently went riding with Frank who rides a RoadStar 1700. We stopped at a gas station and a fella came over to look at his bike. He owned a Hardley (was he riding it?, of course not) and asked Frank if his fenders were plastic. ???? The Roadstar is a superior machine to any of Hardley's "big" bikes anyway you slice it. Hardley owners simply don't know any better.

3) Loaded with shit. Yeah, if 'shit' means 'THE Shit' as in horsepower and torque, titanium valves and brakes to stop a battleship. Hardley components are 1970's era technology. Remember Ford Pinto's, AMC Gremlin's, Chevrolet Vega's?? You get the picture. Single solid rotor front disc brakes: Hardley admits they don't put good brakes on their bikes 'cause it would scare first time riders. There are Jap 600cc bikes out there with DOUBLE the horsepower of 1200cc and bigger Hardleys that are bulletproof reliable.

4) I see alot of Hardleys for sale with ridiculous asking prices. They don't get 'em. Pick up any Cycle Trader type sale magazine. There are 50 pages of Hardleys in there no one will buy. Go price a good used GoldWing, FJR1300, Hayabusa,CBR1100XX, ST1100, ST1300, VFR800.. You get the picture.

In conclusion these guys simply don't know any better. Most are old fat men who still think it is 1965 when Hardley made 'big power' compared to Triumph and Norton; maybe 30HP in race trim. A new 50cc Vespa would outrun 'em. They're better now; some even have 60HP! %0 years of R&D and the got a whopping 30 HP to show for it. Of course, a Kawasaki ZX6R (600cc) pushes 110HP. Hmmmmmmmmmmm. Earth calling the braindead!

Next!

***************** FLASH ******************

"Mother nature has gotten out of control!"

-Susan Estrich
Commenting to Sean Hannity on New Orleans

I guess we had nature under control...... when, exactly?

Queeners are Ass Deep into the Methodist Church

Minister Fired for Denying Practicing Queener Church Membership


You see how this happens don't you? No?

First you have to have a bunch pantywaist men being led around by the 'women' in the church. After the chicks get tired of naggin' the menfolk into doing things, they decide they should get to be 'officially' in charge and nag the menfolk into that. Sure, there are men out there who don't even have to be nagged, who hold no conviction about their beliefs or faith and see no harm in lettin' women preach and run things even though the Bible warns against this. A man with no spine in a more sane time was commonly said to have a 'feminine mind' not refering to his sexuality. After the Oprah set gets a foothold you'd better believe it will damned sure go straight to shit.

The Bishop "Charlene" is referenced in the article. Nothing less than a grassroots purge will save this "church" from extinction. Put a fork in 'em. They're done.

That "I" thing.

Y'all see I've got a graphic below of Hank. To me Hank is what country music was, is, and should forever be. There's nothin' like that twanging voice breaking just right. And the subject matter; women, whiskey, whinin', and "don't give a damn" songs. Perfecttion.

Example: "There's a tear in my beer, 'cause I'm cryin' for you dear."

Now, that's density of subject matter! But, I digress.

Hank's boy is a fine Southern icon, and his grandson finally got his shit together sounding eerily like THE Hank. But, them boys are tryin' to do what the Grandaddy done by nature, and the tale is told in the "I"'s. Every so often in his progenies' songs they break out with that damned yankee "Iyee". Sounds like fingernails on a chalkboard and there are otherwise fine songs that I cannot listen to due to this abomination.

There are some places in the South where the two pronunciations coexist though not interchangeably. Example: "It's right there, dammit!" right is pronounced with the correct Southern i while "That's right, Bubba, we should shoot that yankee bastard." may be pronounced with the yankee i.

It ain't hard to tell when a feller grew up in L.A. and is tryin' to fake our local dialect or he's putin' on airs tryin' to sound high-falutin' (Anyone think sounding like a buckeye makes you sophisticated?) though I'm sure they think we can't tell the difference.
Know what I say?
phwwwit!
That's what I say.

Three Lies Told by Harley Riders

1. I won this here belt buckle in a rodeo!
2. That there's my HOG and it's paid for!
3. Honest, officer, I was just "helping" that sheep
over the fence.

Everyone else is a wannabe

'nuf said.

That's Not a Mother

What's that psycho bitches name.. Sheehan? Don't expect the usual, "She has a right to say....because of her son's death." bullshit to appear here. Let me tell you what this nut is about.

She's one of those ubercontrolling wive's/mothers. She's one of those that wants everything her way and uses every emotional trick in the book to get it. If things don't go the slightest bit her way she broods, fumes, plots, and metes out punishment.

She's a nutcase liberal and her poor son had to grow up listening to that crap his whole life. She probably tried to make him into a panty-waist liberal cocksucker and he had to join the army to get out of her clutches. She's a control freak.

She doesn't miss him. She doesn't grieve for him. She uses him. She's contorting the meaning of his death in direct contradiction to the meaning of the gift he gave in the sacrifice of his young life. She dishonours his memory intentionally, because she's furious he defied her. This is her retribution. She's a bitch.

Dial-a-Nag

This is not directed at Gregg, though Gregg and Welldigger are, indeed, the genesis of the idea.

Occasionally the single men among us get carried away with a train of thought or pursue a question or point way past relevancy or pertinence; i.e. they go off the deep end. When this happens I always get to thinkin', "If these fella's had a wife/steady girlfriend they wouldn't have the time to cause a ruckus or go around appearing disconnected from reality. What they need is some woman tellin' 'em what they should be doing all the time." Just like me. Just like Nate. Just like Vox, and Bane, and Res, and.......you know know who you are.

I can't remember if Res Ispa or I came up with the idea so let's just say Res did so he'll get the blame. I'll tell Mrs. JACIII it was all his doing, but the gist of it is that we set Gregg or Welldigger up with a 1-900 number and when our wives feel like naggin' someone we have them call Gregg or Digger. It's for their own good, really. Gregg and Digger get what they deserve...er, uh...need and we get some relief for the paltry sum of , say, .25 per minute.


Res has fleshed this out a bit more:

JAC,
I think we need to develop the dial a nag idea more. We could be missing out on a million dollar business idea. Dial a nag and dialanag.com could fill the niche for men who think they want to be married but want to try it first. If we do it right, we can charge men to use it, and we could charge women to do the nagging. I’m thinking we could have a nag a therapy business too. We’d get women that are mad about whatever to set by the phone and when an unsuspecting guy calls in they can lay into him about what ever their husband hasn’t done yet. It’s truly a win win.
Res Ipsa

We may be onto something here...

Just a heads up for y’all:

Expect some changes ‘around here. I’m gettin’ weary of the pirate motif, I still dig my Gravatar but I’m getting’ that wanderlust again. All this motorcycle talk I reckon.

I’ll still be sailin’ and campin’ on available weekends - weather permitting. But the heart in yer throat, gleam in yer eye call of high horsepower to weight ratios is becoming unbearable.

I’ve been good – I sported my bride around Tennessee on the Mothership, I took my girls on maritime adventures – but, well, ya' see....

I spotted this GL1800 a half mile ahead of me on the parkway yesterday. Ol' Big Red just grabbed my right wrist and twisted it WFO. The geezerglide was in the process of passing someone as I closed on it. The hairs on the back of that old man's neck must have stood right up, cause he gunned it. Been watchin’ too much Orange County Hospital,er... choppers I reckon. Why, I had to shift into 3rd gear to make the ‘whump’ sound as I went by!

Ouch.

Bet that left a mark.

Guest Blogger - The New Guy : Riding the Dragon and other goings on

After waiting about an hour or so for Jim and his lovely wife, following Rainman we moved on towards Knoxville (which we were supposed to have passed hours ago) in order to get to Gatlinburg. After leaving Richmond at 9:15 AM we arrived in Gatlinburg at 5:30 to check into a chalet for a night so the 9 of us could have an enjoyable evening together before attempting to tame the Dragon on Saturday. Upon checking in we discovered that the original cost that was quoted to us had hidden charges that amounted to an extra hundred dollars, we decided to go ahead and get the place we had called about and take our chances on it being worth the money we were about to spend.

Rainman and his lovely wife, Big Yamaha,

(ed - we generally don't refer to each other's wives as "Big" anything. Not sure what he's getting at here...)

and his lovely wife, and The New Guy trekked up the mountain Ober Gatlinburg to find our new found love nest and to our surprise we found a place that was worthy of every penny we had spent for it. The place had a bedroom for everyone, hot tug, Jacuzzi bath, fire place, pool table and more, if you are looking for a place to stay in Gatlinburg call the ERA rental office and get the Stagecoach Stop, and you will truly enjoy it.

After moving around a bit to check out our new environment we found that Robinsonville and his young bride had caught up with us (they left the Paris area about 2:00 PM and were there by 6:00 PM.). Tim and Jill settled in and then the 4 biker MEN decided to go down the mountain a bit to pick up some refreshments for the night, off we rode.

The guys bought all that we though might be consumed that night and moved back to our love nest (I us that term for Rainmain) so we could decide on dinner arrangements.

The group decided that we would like a steak so down the mountain we descended to Peddlers to get a great steak, salad and to watch 2 women make out on the porch in front of us. We all ate dinner then rode back up the mountain to the Love Nest

Upon returning the Love Nest the guys went down stairs to play pool and watch TV while the women built a fire because they were cold and enjoyed a movie on the 1st floor.

Rainman and The New Guy took on Robinsonville and Big Yamaha and was no match for the Luck that Robinsonville spilled onto the table so they beat the pants off of Rainman (which worked out great for him) and The New Guy.